Known by his stage name Jelly Roll, Jason Bradley DeFord has released a track that hits right to the core exposing vulnerability but with the acceptance that it deserves.
The song starts with an open admission:
“I am not okay, I’m barely getting by,
I’m losing track of days, I’m losing sleep at night.”
Whilst this may portray a vulnerable state of mind, it provides strength and reassurance to many encountering similar emotions that they are not alone (something he confirmed in a social media posting). Whilst the reason for the lack of sleep isn’t explored, it could be a whole host of things ranging from imposter syndrome, having a lack of identity to financial problems.
“I know I can't be the only one
Who's holding on for dear life
But God knows, I know
When it's all said and done
I'm not okay
But it's all gonna be alright
It's not okay
But we're all gonna be alright.”
The chorus references how they’re not the only one feeling like this. This is where the song gains unity with the listener providing the reassurance and breaking the silence that is often concealing our true self.
“I woke up today
I almost stayed in bed
Had the devil on my back
And voices in my head
Some days, it ain't all bad
Some days, it all gets worse
Some days, I swear I'm better off
Layin' in that dirt.”
The second verse details the inner struggle and motivation that we face during dark and troubling times. The verse, much like the song, has hints of self care throughout, such as staying in bed which we all sometimes need just to help refocus ourselves. Whilst some may deem the song melancholic, it is positive, with subtle references such as ‘almost stayed in bed’ reminding us that we have the strength to choose, and “some days, it ain’t all bad…” reminding us to view even the glimmer of hope and positivity as this will shape our focus, outlook and mentality.
The song then returns to the chorus followed by the bridge.
“I know one day
We'll see the other side
The pain'll wash away
In a holy water tide
And we all gonna be alright.”
The bridge shows an upbeat and positive outlook at a time where we might not be shining as brightly. “We’ll see the other side” has dual meaning, one of optimism in a dark time, or one of death. The lyric “in a holy water tide” could reflect the tears and being laid to rest; conversely could reflect being rediscovered and rebirthed. The takeaway message however is stated in the final line “And we all gonna be alright.”
The song once again returns to the chorus to play out the song, reminding us that whilst we perhaps feel isolated and alone in these feelings, often we are anything but. These feelings and emotions affect us all at some stage, but ultimately allow us to be in tune with our own bodies and psyche to know how we are and what we want and need to recover.
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